[ 12.03.2007, 06:05: Message edited by: Black Mask ]
Posted by Abby (Member # 582) on :
A nap in the disabled toilet.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
coca cola and nurofen plus.
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
My eyes feel funny
Posted by wonderstarr (Member # 1158) on :
Quarter Pounder with Cheese Meal, Medium Fries, Milk Shake.
Posted by vikram (Member # 98) on :
ice cold water, baked potato, vitamin c, shot of vodka
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
WHY DOES BOBO HEAD HURT?
[ 12.03.2007, 06:38: Message edited by: Black Mask ]
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
and those Kool n Soothe things that you put on your forehead. Those can mean the difference between crying under the sheets with a frigid jar of pesto pressed up against your head, and actually moving around, going to the toilet, and having small conversations.
.
Yesterday I had a bit of trouble following a heady night out. I took some max strength ibuprofen and some nytol, and that did the job.
On saturday night, I got to shake Adam Buxton's hand. He's quite small.
[ 12.03.2007, 06:43: Message edited by: Jimmy Big Nuts ]
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
quote:Originally posted by Jimmy Big Nuts:
On saturday night, I got to shake Adam Buxton's hand.
Better than sex?
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
Have any of you piss heads ever fallen off scaffolding, under the mistaken belief that you're a superhero?
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
quote:Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles: Have any of you piss heads ever fallen off scaffolding, under the mistaken belief that you're a superhero?
Yes.
Twice.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
quote:Originally posted by Black Mask:
quote:Originally posted by Jimmy Big Nuts:
On saturday night, I got to shake Adam Buxton's hand.
Better than sex?
about the same
Posted by Boy Racer (Member # 498) on :
quote:Originally posted by Black Mask: Any suggestions?
Sex.
Eggs.
Coffee.
Lots of water.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by Black Mask: Yes.
Twice.
God, that's terrible. So it is true then.
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
I swam across the Thames once, as well. And committed an act of piracy. Official.
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
I pissed off a balcony onto the heads of the assembled dignitaries at the Royal Northern College of Music in Manchester. I puked onto a police car from a great height at a party in Lisson Grove.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by Black Mask: I swam across the Thames once, as well. And committed an act of piracy. Official.
I bet you felt invincible, right?
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
These were all at different times. Not last night.
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
quote:Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles:
quote:Originally posted by Black Mask: I swam across the Thames once, as well. And committed an act of piracy. Official.
I bet you felt invincible, right?
I did. Until I got arrested.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by Black Mask:
quote:Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles:
quote:Originally posted by Black Mask: I swam across the Thames once, as well. And committed an act of piracy. Official.
I bet you felt invincible, right?
I did. Until I got arrested.
I bet you were 'most vulnerable' then, huh?
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
quote:Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles: I bet you were 'most vulnerable' then, huh?
I was. I was looking at a capital offence. I could've hung (hanged?).
Posted by Waynster (Member # 56) on :
Best thing for a hangover? Drinking heavily the night before....
Slightly more serious, Bananas are supposed to be good - the seratonin apparently eases the head symptoms. Take lots of fluid (Water as opposed to lager mind)
More booze will not help - I have tried, and it only makes the pain worse...
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
Go on then Mask, I know you're itching to tell the story.
[ 12.03.2007, 07:15: Message edited by: MiscellaneousFiles ]
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
I stole a pleasure cruiser and crashed it into a bridge.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by Black Mask: I stole a pleasure cruiser and crashed it into a bridge.
God, that's awful. Was anyone injured?
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
No.
Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
This may sound like bragging but I’m extremely confused as to why I didn’t have a hangover yesterday. Saturday night I went to a house party and consumed (from what I remember) large quantities of ‘beerquilla’ (lager plus added tequila), several shots of JD, neat tequila, white rum, dark rum, red wine, pernod, and straight up lager (Fosters too, guaranteed hangover hell or double your money back). I was so inebriated that midway through the evening I staggered drunkenly out into the street under the pretence of going for a walk, then proceeded to climb into my car, curl up and go to sleep. I slept verily until someone woke me up (apparently a search party was sent out by my concerned chums when I disappeared without a word, and it took them a good half an hour to think about checking in my car) and insisted I go inside to sleep. I can only surmise that the fact I drank the majority of the spirits neat with no soft drinks, plus the fact I didn’t drink too many fruit juices, combined with a healthy amount of sleep contributed to the fact I didn’t get a hangover.
Still, the point has to be raised that my hangovers have become increasingly vicious, like the headaches experienced by Max in Pi, as I have gotten older. So for me to get blindingly drunk without actually getting a hangover is confusing at best. I can maybe attribute it, in some part, to the fact I’m healthier now since doing all the cycling and whatnot, and the stopping of the smoking meant no toiletmouth the next day. If this is one of the benefits of being healthier, then bring it on!
Posted by Nathan Bleak (Member # 1040) on :
Yeah, smoking adds a really horrible, sickly raw edge to your hangover and it makes you sleep worse. Taking it out of the occassion spares you a lot of pain the next day.
Posted by Boy Racer (Member # 498) on :
I have also noticed an appreciable diminishing of hangovers since the beginning of my current fitness drive Ringo. Good innit.
I've still got to sort out quitting the fags though.
Posted by Waynster (Member # 56) on :
Apparently as well being fit does help a great deal in recovery also, or so I have been told. Mine are bastards - perhaps its time I tried to get fitter..
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
Eat Y'self Fitter
I'm in the furniture trade Got a new job today But stick the cretin On the number-three lathe
Went down the town To a HM club The sign had a cross Through a couple well-dressed They looked at my coat They looked at my hair An Easy Rider coot Grabbed the edge of my coat Said: 'You're too smart for here' I said: 'I'll see the manager'
He was the manager Eat y'self fitter Up the stairs mister Eat y'self fitter
Analytics have got My type worked out Analytics on me The poison render I grope about And when I go out My mind splits My eyes doth hurt The musical chairs Have been swallowed up By a cuddly group Who land and rub off Hoping that Whatever it is Will land and drop off
I met a hero of mine I shook his hand Got trapped in the door Felt a fool, I tell ya
Charmed to meet ya Eat y'self fitter Up the stairs mister Eat y'self fitter
Became a recluse And bought a computer Set it up in the home Elusive big one On the screen Saw the Holy Ghost, I swear On the screen
Where's the cursor? Where's the eraser? Where's the cursor? Where's the eraser? G-O-H-O-H-O-9-O G-O-H-O-H-O-9-O G-O-H-O-H-O-9-O H-O-9-O-G-O-H-O
What's a computer? Eat y'self fitter What's a computer? Eat y'self fitter
The Kevin Ayers scene South of France Plush velvet Aback! Aback! Aback! Aback! Levis Fridays Greek holidays Barratt heritance X 3
Who tells you what To tape on your vid. chip How do you know the progs you miss Are worse than those you single out? And what'll you do when the rental's up? And your bottom rack is full of vids Of programs you will nay look at The way they act is, oh, sheer delight Cardboard copyright Make it right Panic in Sudan Panic in Wardour Panic in Granadaland Panic all over By the wretched timesheeters Of my delight One starry night The powers that be will have to meet And have no choice but to...
Eat each other Eat y'self fitter Eat each other? Eat y'self fitter
(Eat y'self fitter)
Portly and with good grace The secret straight-back ogre entered His brain aflame With all the dreams It had conjured X4
Mit-dem Don't wanna be a mid-dem X4
The centimeter square Eat y'self fitter Said it purged fear Eat y'self fitter
(Eat y'self fitter)
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by Black Mask: I stole a pleasure cruiser and crashed it into a bridge.
I find the best cure for a hangover is not drinking the night before. Right girls?
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
Spot on, jonesy.
Back in my drinking days, I found the most effective cure for a hangover was a stiff drink. Worked every fucking time.
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
I believe the main hangover cure cliche is to glug down as much water as you can possibly stomach before you go to bed drunk. As with many cliches, this is completely true, although it does require you to be conscious and functioning at the time of going to bed, in which case you're probably not actually drunk enough to have a hangover anyway. Hmm.
Posted by sabian (Member # 6) on :
<smug> I don't get hangovers </smug>
But a mate of mine swears by the following:
One Snickers bar (or Marathon if you live in the past)
Two (no more, no less) parecetamol tablets with 1/2 a 12oz can of 7up
1 bag of Ready Salted Crisps
Rest of 7up
I've always though hangover cures to be a bit shit, but having seen him almost unable to move, to 30 mins later "up and at 'em" makes me wish I got hungover to try it!
Posted by New Way Of Decay (Member # 106) on :
How are you feeling now, Black Mask?
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
Bit achey. Tired.
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
*****
Posted by New Way Of Decay (Member # 106) on :
Doesn't sound like you've been spiked then.
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
quote:Originally posted by sabian: <smug> I don't get hangovers </smug>
That's because Americans only ever drink two pints before they pass out.
There was a great documentary once about the hard-drinking culture among British airline pilots and cabin crew - the ludicrous but unforgettable "experiment" that formed the centrepiece of the programme was to give a crew of American pilots the equivalent amounts of alcohol drunk by British pilots and film the results in a flight simulator.
By the time the Americans had the equivalent of half a bottle of vodka in them they were all fighting or crying or face down over the instrument panels. When they reached barely half of what British crews were alleged to consume the announcer intoned: "The crew has completely lost control of the plane." I will have a look on YouTube for that tonight.
Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
lol. I might actually watch telly if there was more stuff like that on. Perhaps there could have been a whole series comparing the effects of alcohol on different nationalities, in different jobs?
Posted by sabian (Member # 6) on :
quote:Originally posted by ben: That's because Americans only ever drink two pints before they pass out.
Yeah... I suppose if America was the country of mediocrity and despair that Britain is, us Yanks may have more of a tolerance too borne of an effort to forget just how shit we really have it.
[ 12.03.2007, 11:34: Message edited by: sabian ]
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
quote:Originally posted by sabian: Yeah... I suppose if America was the country of mediocrity and despair that Britain is, us Yanks may have more of a tolerance too borne of an effort to forget just how shit we really have it.
Posted by Nathan Bleak (Member # 1040) on :
What does that sentence even think it means?
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
You wouldn't understand...it's an American thing.
Posted by Nathan Bleak (Member # 1040) on :
I think I've just about untangled it. Is it trying to say that... if America was shit, like Britain, then they also would have a greater tolerance of alcohol, because they'd drink more to try and cope?
It doesn't make any sense that Sabian would say that, though, because he chooses to live in Britain. It doesn't make any sense that ralph would agree, either, because he lives in America and he's an alcoholic.
Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
WTF...
[ 12.03.2007, 11:49: Message edited by: Ringo ]
Posted by sabian (Member # 6) on :
quote:Originally posted by Nathan Bleak: I think I've just about untangled it.
Well done... It was typed whilst standing and pre-"run to the kids room to find out why they are fighting" mode...
quote:Originally posted by Nathan Bleak: It doesn't make any sense that Sabian would say that, though, because he chooses to live in Britain.
It's only an observation.
When I first got here, I couldn't understand why people would have pub lunches then get proper pissed after work before going home and then blinding drunk on weekends. Back home, the only time you drank was on a Friday or Saturday to unwind after a work week. If you drank at any time other than those two days, you were an alcoholic. And, if you *EVER* came to work with the scent of booze on you, you'd be sacked on the spot.
After several months in the British version of the rat race, I then understood. Waiting for the weekend to lose yourself in drink just wouldn't suffice anymore.
Posted by wonderstarr (Member # 1158) on :
I'm sure I've seen ads for an American beer recently, though, that suggest the slightest mini-male-achievement deserves a bottle of cold suds.
They run (you can find them on phone boxes, mostly)
BECAUSE HER GIFT DIDN'T BUY ITSELF. One cold bottle of YOU BET I EARNED IT.
BECAUSE YOU GO TO WORK. ALL DAY. One cold bottle of YOU BET I EARNED IT.
The tone seems American to me, but the suggestion is that you should drink just because you've fired off a couple of emails at work, or been polite on the phone, or washed up your lunch plate. Which, actually, isn't far from my own system of reward.
Posted by wonderstarr (Member # 1158) on :
(Obviously the response to this could be that this American beer is targeting a British audience, and that the US campaign would run
BECAUSE YOU GO TO WORK ALL WEEK. One cold bottle of YOU BET I EARNED IT. PLEASE ENJOY RESPONSIBLY. MORE THAN ONE COLD BOTTLE OF YOU BET I EARNED IT MAY CONSTITUTE ALCOHOLISM. CONSULT YOUR DOCTOR FOR DETAILS.)
However, I expect there are vast differences across "America", that land of various cultures that we refer to by a single name!
Posted by sabian (Member # 6) on :
If adverts are to be used as a benchmark of society, I despair.
Posted by sabian (Member # 6) on :
quote:Originally posted by wonderstarr: However, I expect there are vast differences across "America", that land of various cultures that we refer to by a single name!
Having been in 44 of the lower 48 States, I can say that for the most part, my earlier post holds true.
Obviously, there are exceptions to the rules, but what would I know? I create my opinions based on phonebooth adverts and what ITV deigns to show me on the tellybox! Posted by wonderstarr (Member # 1158) on :
quote:Originally posted by sabian: Obviously, there are exceptions to the rules, but what would I know? I create my opinions based on phonebooth adverts and what ITV deigns to show me on the tellybox!
Whoah, Chewie. I wasn't suggesting any grand theory based on two phone booth ads. If anything it backs up your notion, because obviously those ads are trying to sell to a British market. That it seems to be an American beer isn't so relevant.
You can't base an understanding of a culture on a few ads, but I think it's a generally-safe bet that those ads do understand the kind of culture they're pitching for. They'd be wasting their money otherwise.
[ 12.03.2007, 16:18: Message edited by: wonderstarr ]
Posted by wonderstarr (Member # 1158) on :
quote:Originally posted by sabian: Having been in 44 of the lower 48 States, I can say that for the most part, my earlier post holds true.
There's an interesting thing. Where does "lower" end? And I could look this up I'm sure very easily, but this was a topic of drinking conversation for me recently so why not keep it on that level - are there 52 states? You still hear people talk about 50 states, and Britain being the "51st State", but I thought Hawaii (Hawai'i?) was the 52nd.
Posted by sabian (Member # 6) on :
Hawaii was the 50th state...
There could be 52 arguably if Washington DC and Puerto Rico were 'inducted' (can't remember proper word) but they aren't so it's 50 States.
The "lower 48 states" most Americans will tell you it's the continental US but, Alaska is still in 'North America' so that doesn't really work.
Basically, the lower 48 are all the states that touch. Alaska and Hawaii don't.
[ 12.03.2007, 16:28: Message edited by: sabian ]
Posted by wonderstarr (Member # 1158) on :
OK, thanks. So there really is some ambiguity about the number of states?* I might have to look this up.
------------- * you're saying no, aren't you. But that there are arguably 52. How confusing
[ 12.03.2007, 16:47: Message edited by: wonderstarr ]
Posted by wonderstarr (Member # 1158) on :
No, I get it now. I have no idea why I thought there might be 52 states. I knew there were 50 stars on the flag so I don't know where my notion came from.
Posted by sabian (Member # 6) on :
quote: Puerto Rico is a self-governing commonwealth in association with the United States. The chief of state is the President of the United States of America. The head of government is an elected Governor. There are two legislative chambers: the House of Representatives, 51 seats, and the Senate, 27 seats.
Puerto Rico has authority over its internal affairs. United States controls: interstate trade, foreign relations and commerce, customs administration, control of air, land and sea, immigration and emigration, nationality and citizenship, currency, maritime laws, military service, military bases, army, navy and air force, declaration of war, constitutionality of laws, jurisdictions and legal procedures, treaties, radio and television--communications, agriculture, mining and minerals, highways, postal system; Social Security, and other areas generally controlled by the federal government in the United States. Puerto Rican institutions control internal affairs unless U.S. law is involved, as in matters of public health and pollution. The major differences between Puerto Rico and the 50 states are its local taxation system and exemption from Internal Revenue Code, its lack of voting representation in either house of the U.S. Congress, the ineligibility of Puerto Ricans to vote in presidential elections, and its lack of assignation of some revenues reserved for the states.
So, it works the same as a State where the State controls laws/commerce/trade interstate, but ultimately has to answer to Federal law.
But, because Puerto Rico is a 'common wealth', it isn't actually a state. This is how Hawaii was treated until it was inducted as a state in the 50s.
Washington DC is supported by Federal taxes, has its own municipal government, and has electoral college votes. Even though on a 'local' level they govern themselves with a city council and a mayor, Congress holds ultimate power over them so they don't have the same power as a state, even though for the most part they work as one.
It's confusing to those of us who are Americans...
NYC may, at some point, become its own state if other NY'ers have any say in the matter. Something stupid like 95% of all NY state income tax and sales tax (like your VAT, but not as dear at 8.5%) goes to NYC to fund it, even though they benefit from all the big business and tourism... Normal NY'ers hate NYC.
Especially NY'ers like me who no matter where I am, if I say I'm from NY it is automatically assumed I'm from NYC! THERE'S A WHOLE FUCKING STATE ATTACHED TO NYC, YOU GEOGRAPHICALLY CHALLENGED **** !
[ 12.03.2007, 17:12: Message edited by: sabian ]
Posted by wonderstarr (Member # 1158) on :
Thanks for all this explanation! Is it the case that Texas went in and out of statehood, and back in? Again... could look it up, but you're more interesting.
Posted by wonderstarr (Member # 1158) on :
Meantime I have checked it out and it seems that Texas was first Mexican, then a republic, then part of the US, then part of the CSA during the Civil War, then readmitted into the US... something along those lines.
Posted by Boy Racer (Member # 498) on :
quote:Originally posted by sabian: Especially NY'ers like me who no matter where I am, if I say I'm from NY it is automatically assumed I'm from NYC! THERE'S A WHOLE FUCKING STATE ATTACHED TO NYC, YOU GEOGRAPHICALLY CHALLENGED **** !
Rather than having an embolism couldn't you just say you're from The State of New York, or New York State (don't tell me that's a University or something isn't it?), or just say the part of New York you're specifically from, Albany or Orange or Columbia or whatever?
[ 13.03.2007, 06:22: Message edited by: Boy Racer ]
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by sabian: But, because Puerto Rico is a 'common wealth', it isn't actually a state. This is how Hawaii was treated until it was inducted as a state in the 50s.
This sounds kind of akin to the Isle of Man's relationship with the UK I guess. It has it's own government, post office, tax laws, telecoms company and is not part of the UK or the EU, but it is a protectorate of the UK and has a British governor and so on. I imagine these sort of places have political advantages for both sides anyway.
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
I quite fancy going to Washington, actually. Washington sounds nice. Though this could be directly related to the fact that I am currently, approximately a decade after everyone else, discovering the joy of The West Wing. Apparently everyone cool has now moved on to The Green Wing instead. Byt the time I get round to that one there'll probably be all manner of wing-named TV shows available for the discerning viewer and I won't have watched any of them.
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
If you just say Washington, you're referring to a state in the north-west.
Ya gotta say DC, baby.
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
Oh, and reading the Isle of Man local news on BBC teletext or whatever that interactive servicey thing is called is excellent. It's stuff like Pig stolen from a prominent piggery yesterday. Police suspect poachers! Controversy reigns over new roundabout on Bushy Head!
That sort of thing. Much better than Manchester news; person dies in attack - change numbers and type of attack daily.
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
Washington DC. Though if I went to Washington DC I'd probably have a wander round the state as well. As long as it was cold. I have given up warm places. They don't suit me. Even the hot biodome at the Eden project was pushing it a bit for me.
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
quote:Originally posted by Louche: Washington DC. Though if I went to Washington DC I'd probably have a wander round the state as well.
Washington Dc, the capital city of Washington State? In the Country of Washingtonia? Washington World.
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
L@@k! Today, the Islae of Man's top story is about the theft of some water valves!
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
quote:Originally posted by Louche: Though if I went to Washington DC I'd probably have a wander round the state as well.
Just, kinda, y'know, wander over there, yeah?
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
quote:Originally posted by mart:
quote:Originally posted by Louche: Though if I went to Washington DC I'd probably have a wander round the state as well.
Just, kinda, y'know, wander over there, yeah?
lol. Just a little 3,000 mile stroll.
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by ralph: lol. Just a little 3,000 mile stroll.
Yeah, I'm afraid that just wouldn't be possible, Louche. You can be shot on sight for walking in America.
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
~
[ 13.03.2007, 10:44: Message edited by: ralph ]
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
That's quite a sinister dot there. It's like someone's got a laser bead right on the middle of your forehead. I can actually feel what it must be like to go walking in America.
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
.![[Frown]](frown.gif)
![[Smile]](smile.gif)
![[Confused]](confused.gif)
![[Roll Eyes]](rolleyes.gif)