TMO is your own personal magic 8 ball/Two-Face's scratched coin - so go on, ask it a question, a yes no question - and let the next poster decide your fate!!!
First up, should I just fuck it all off and go an live in LA?
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by Benny the Ball: First up, should I just fuck it all off and go an live in LA?
Signs point to "No"
Should I put up some skirting boards in my bedroom tonight?
Posted by herbs (Member # 101) on :
Yes. Imagine the satisfaction, and smell of No More Nails as you drift off to sleep.
Q. Is there anything more nauseating than a Cath Kidson sample sale in Battersea Arts Centre (across the road), stuffed to the gills with yummy mummies loading the back of Zacharia's three-wheeler with bags of chintz bedspreads?
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by herbs: Q. Is there anything more nauseating than a Cath Kidson sample sale in Battersea Arts Centre (across the road), stuffed to the gills with yummy mummies loading the back of Zacharia's three-wheeler with bags of chintz bedspreads?
ETA: Magic Eight Balls can't do pictures... Hng.
[ 14.05.2007, 11:06: Message edited by: MiscellaneousFiles ]
Posted by Benny the Ball (Member # 694) on :
quote:Originally posted by herbs: Yes. Imagine the satisfaction, and smell of No More Nails as you drift off to sleep.
Q. Is there anything more nauseating than a Cath Kidson sample sale in Battersea Arts Centre (across the road), stuffed to the gills with yummy mummies loading the back of Zacharia's three-wheeler with bags of chintz bedspreads?
Herbs, I'm on Wandsworth Road, should I come down and we can tag team and smash the shit out of the place?
Posted by dance margarita (Member # 848) on :
quote:Originally posted by herbs: Q. Is there anything more nauseating than a Cath Kidson sample sale in Battersea Arts Centre (across the road), stuffed to the gills with yummy mummies loading the back of Zacharia's three-wheeler with bags of chintz bedspreads?
the word 'bambinocino'? i live over a gourmet pizza restaurant and they sell bambinocinos by the the bucketload. babycino i could just about deal with, once my counsellor and i had discussed coping mechanisms, but now they have rechristened the babycino the bambinocino, which just melts my mind. on the plus side, my bedroom always smells a little bit of chorizo and chargrilled artichokes, which is ever so good for my appetite.
Posted by Benny the Ball (Member # 694) on :
shouldn't it be bambolcino too? Idiots.
Is it just a small cup of milk? Idiots.
Posted by sabian (Member # 6) on :
Running a parenting board, I can assure you, these are minor 'annoyances' compared to the weird and sorted things mothers get up to when they have money to burn and free time!
Posted by dance margarita (Member # 848) on :
i dont know about bambolcino/ bambinocino, i dont speak italian. it is a small cup of frothy milk. a very small cup. it costs £1. often you get some cocoa powder on top. not usually one pound's worth, though.
Posted by dance margarita (Member # 848) on :
i am trying to do a joke about monkeys in wanky coffee bars drinking capuchinos but it wont come out.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by dance margarita: monkeys in wanky coffee bars drinking capuchinos
I think that's a line from Bob Dylan's new song Suburban Homesick Blues.
Posted by Benny the Ball (Member # 694) on :
I think it was in the original Georgy Formby version, but Dylan cut it in protest of the number of electric guitars in vietnam.
Posted by wonderstarr (Member # 1158) on :
I like that phone, it is very pretty.
I got a free americano today in some Surbiton caff because I drank half of it, then claimed that their sweeping the floor and fridge around me had contaminated my foam with dust. My assertiveness made me laugh literally all the way to the bank, where I arranged to borrow £103,700.
Sorry this isn't my "blog" I know.
Posted by Lickapaw#2 (Member # 1049) on :
quote:Originally posted by wonderstarr:
I got a free americano today in some Surbiton caff because I drank half of it, then claimed that their sweeping the floor and fridge around me had contaminated my foam with dust.
I was in a bar once, most of my way through a particularly expensive double vodka and coke. I had almost, but not quite finished it. There was a bit of melted ice water in the bottom tinted with the very last of the cola. It tasted of water. But the point was, I was still drinking it.
The barmaid came along and nicked it, thinking it was dead. I grumbled, frowned a tiny bit, and my temperature raised by a couple of degrees and my fight or flight mechanism cranked up. So I got up to the bar and told some guy behind there who was also staff that she'd taken my not-yet-finished drink, and sat down. A couple of minutes later barmaid stormed past, plonked a double-smirnoff-and-coke moodily in front of me and disappeared before I could say thank you.
I take it that drink came out of her wages.
I was darkly pleased with myself, too.
EDIT: Do not change tense in the middle of a post.
[ 15.05.2007, 08:43: Message edited by: Lickapaw#2 ]
Posted by Tilde (Member # 1215) on :
She probably spat in it.
Posted by Lickapaw#2 (Member # 1049) on :
quote:Originally posted by Tilde: She probably spat in it.
Fuckin' hell. Now somebody tells me.
*Shakes TMO*
Did the barmaid leave any bodily fluids in my drink?
[ 15.05.2007, 08:51: Message edited by: Lickapaw#2 ]
Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
I once had a Malibu & Coke, that was approx 3/4 full, removed by a glass collector, while I briefly turned my back to put my camera back in my bag. And it cost £6! They refused to do anything about it, so I didn't buy any more drinks for the rest of the evening.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
they were doing you a favour, VP.
Posted by Tilde (Member # 1215) on :
Ah malibu, you know bignuts, once when I was getting off with a girlfriend at a party, she swigged a mouthful of malibu straight from the bottle and then french kissed me.
It was alright.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
I went out with a girl who drank malibu and she dumped me because she thought I was gay. I don't know what that was about though. When I got up her up to my room so I could put my fingers in her vagina, she just lay there like a plank of wood. That was during the 'green light bulb' phase.
[ 15.05.2007, 09:31: Message edited by: Jimmy Big Nuts ]
Posted by dance margarita (Member # 848) on :
i once tried to convince a bartender that he had thrown away my shot of absinthe before i had time to drink it. he had already recompensed the person standing next to me one shot of absinthe for doing the same, and i thought it was worth a bash convincing him that he had committed the same completely incomprehensible bar- crime twice in a row if there was a free shot of absinthe in it for me. the conversation ended a bit like this:
me: you did! you threw away my absinthe! i want another one.
him: no i didnt. youre not getting one.
me: well, i definitely bought a shot of absinthe, look, i havent got any money left. (at this stage, i held out my empty palm, as if to prove that he must have taken the last of my money)
him: no
me: but!
him: next
me: ABsinthe!
him: twat
if any of the bartenders i similarly harrassed on a regualr basis in the period between 1998 and 2005 are reading, you have my sincerest apologies for everything ever.
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by Tilde: Ah malibu, you know bignuts, once when I was getting off with a girlfriend at a party, she swigged a mouthful of malibu straight from the bottle and then french kissed me.
Did she get to try Malibu & Cock?
Posted by Zygote (Member # 883) on :
