What the fuck is going on with shaving? Eh? I looked into Superdrug today to buy a new razor. I was going to buy one of those new Gillette ones, what Beckham's flogging. I decided to try one of these on the recommendation of my father. My father. I've always been a bit of a maverick when it comes to shaving. Never had a brand. Never used gel. Never had a smell. On the main stuck to disposables. Had the occasional hungover barbershop shave. Used the expensive birthday razors, and the two complimentary blades in the base of the razor-holder. But never saw the whole shaving thing as a big deal. Now, I know there are a few well-thought-of benders here on the boards who take their personal grooming very seriously. Fair fucks to them, I say. Long may they admire their chins. I, personally, think there was no better shave than the black-handled, single-razor, bull-barred Bic hacking the facial hair from the Mask chin greased with warm Imperial L(e)ather.
New razors are something else, though. I tried my old man's groovy new razor. I'd seen the advert, as well. Beckham. Beckham selling razors... I'm sure Beckham's a nice bloke, and I'm sure he shaves every couple of months, but I'll bet the stubble he displays for the cameras is applied by his stylist Serge. The impression they give with the new razor is that it gives your face an electric shock to gussy up your chin-hair ready for the barrage of blades. Fact is, it just vibrates a bit. It's a bit shit. When I was checking out these razors in the shop, though, I saw the other new-wave of face-strippers. There's one that looks like and F-14 jet. There's one that looks like a Ferrari. There's one that looks like a hammer-headed javelin. I bet not one of them gives you a better shave than the old black Bic. Now they have two, three or four blades. They have bendy faces. They have lubricating strips. They have swivel heads. They 'vibrate'. They have ergonomic handles. It seems like they're designing razors for people too young to actually put their hands up to owning any real-life, bona-fide, face hair. What gives?
I didn't buy the new razor in the end. I'll see out the Sainsbury's £2.09 for 10 disposable razors I'm currently using.
I did get a tube of something called King of Shaves, though. And that's very good.
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Wilkinson Sword 3d FX 3-blade jobby with Nivea shaving gel, gets the job done and doesn't cause any discomfort, the blades on the WS seem to last quite well too. King of Shaves does give a damn comfortable shave but I used to find that you have to be extra careful to wash it all of afterwards or it can cause spots, at least it did when I used it which was a few years back.
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What a fucking beezer first post. I wish at least one Sunday newspaper could employ someone to write columns like that every week, instead of the up yours I'm going to fart out five hundred words of fuck-all I have to hold my nose through while reading the "quality" press. And you style that kind of stuff after a nite out with the missus and nippers on the moules!
I use a kit called QUATTRO and this is a rare example of something that lives up to its promotion. It's only basic physics I suppose, but it was still a pleasant surprise: it's true, four blades do a better job than two. Prior to buying a QUATTRO I'd been using my old man's old razor, a primitive dual-blade Wilkinson with only sentimental value. For a close skin of the cheek and chin I'd taken to shaving twice -- trying to recapture the four-day smoothness that followed my professional barber shave (hot towels, blood, steam -- it was like giving birth in an old movie) but as the maths spells out, if you use four blades you are shaving twice with one stroke.
I do the job last thing at night to give my face a chance to recover from that immediate rawness, so it's got itself back to normal by morning. If I've left it three days rather than the usual one or two (after 24 hours I'm looking like Geo Michael) I will go all home-spa on the nascent beard, bending over the sink with a towel over my head like Lawrence of Arabia and pouring in boiling water to steam and soften it up. I have used that King of Shaves in the past but I don't find its translucency an advantage: I prefer a trad white foam so you can see where you've been. From age 17 or so I worked it up myself with bristles and shave-stick but now I go lazy with an aerosol, shooming it out like fake snow. I think the brand is Gilette.
quote:Originally posted by Black Mask: OTE - Physic, do you shave your entire head with that?
Never dared try and shave my head with an actual razor no, cutting your chin shaving is annoying enough, the idea of having bits of tissue dotted over half my scalp has put me off so far strangely enough, I use electric clippers for that, maybe one of these days I'll get brave and try it...
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I stopped shaving three weeks ago and I’m not sure why. I think I must have not shaved for a few days and then reached a point where shaving off what had grown on my face became more trouble than leaving what had sprouted in situ. To remove two weeks worth of chin pubes involves too much trimming, even Kovacs four bladed razor beast (I too have tried the Quattro and found the shave to be sub-standard and uncomfortable) couldn’t remove the accumulated beardage without a trimming and to trim would involve using a ‘beard trimmer’ which, although I do own is a cumbersome monstrosity with guards that slip and slide and cause you to nick yourself. On the whole it’s worse than shaving. I also stopped going to get my hair cut on a regular basis so I’m looking a little the worse for wear.
The Beckham razor has a battery in it doesn’t it? I don’t see the point to that unless it vibrates. Does it vibrate? I bet it does... I expect you can use it to tickle your prostate. I want a man with proper facial hair to sell me my razors. An hirsute man mountain of masculinity coated from head to toe in thick worm like hairs and sporting a chin like that black stone you use to sharpen knives not Beckham oh no, with three hairs on his dainty chinny, chin, chin I’d only believe he uses a razor to trim his bikini line in an emergency when he runs out of wax.
I hate shaving, when I do I use a pre-shave wash from Boots for sensitive skin and the King of Shaves Alaphagel (pictured above) also for sensitive skin which keeps irritation and razor bun down to a bare minimum. But as you can’t buy King of Shaves Alaphagel in bloody Holland I get stuck with an assortment of evil gels and foams all of which inflame and bung up my pores and give me the look of an acne’d teenager despite my advancing years.
There seem to be a few beards around at the moment, perhaps beards are cool again and I am cutting edge but I doubt it.
And it itches.
I wish I had some decent shaving gel.
Best shave I ever had was in Turkey in 1988. Hot towels, special oils and a cut throat razor wielded by a short hairy man who looked like he needed to shave thrice a day to keep his chin fuzz free. I think he mocked my British pube beard as childlike and scrawny but when he’d finished with his blades and potions my skin was soft as silk and I was trimmed and tidied to almost perfection and not only that, but, for the bargain price of one pound fifty I got a free trim and a head massage fantastic.
Beards hide stuff though so that’s cool – I’m hiding a Chinaman in mine.
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King of shaves - the green one. And one Mach 3 set of blades per six months - partly due to not shaven a great deal, partly because of my soft, boyish, insipid facial pubes.
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I use four bladed razor I think its the quattro one I received it free with a lads magazine I bought which I thought was a good buy because it was cheaper to buy the mag than the razor.
As for the gel the stuff I'm using at the moment is fresh. Its mint SOURCE and it rocks It makes your face tingle and burns slightly which gives you a greater incentive to remove it.
To finish, a dab of king of shaves balm to soothe my raked face. I repeat this sequence about once a week or I grow a silly patchy chin beard
I plan a captain ahab as soon as I complete puberty
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Lol at wolfman-Darryn, you want a care parcel of non-face-wrecking shave stuff sent over before you get cast as the lead in American Werewolf in Amsterdam dude?
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Darryn you look HOTT with a beard! I like beards. I do have some of that shave stuff for you though: bought it a zillion years ago and never sent it. I'll send it tomorrow so you get it by Christmas!
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Darryn, you look very Dutch with that beard. And Beckett has turned into an enormobaby. What on earth have you been feeding him?
quote: So, any of you lads do... lower down?
I was going to ask the boys' opinions on more adventurous depilation. You see these crazy Germans on Eurotrash and they have no bodily hair whatsoever. I mean, I've waxed and epilated in my time, although I draw the line at a Brazilian. (I'm not having some shopgirl ripping the pubic hairs out of my arsehole with a teatowel and some hot wax.) But it never occured to me that it might be an option for the guys. I'd heard of back, sack and crack wax, but I thought it was only hardcore queers who were into that. Am I wrong?
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I got bought an electric razor two years ago and I would normally use that to shave. I didn't realise how expensive they are and just buying a decent one seems to come into the 80-100 pounds mark. For a cheap plastic electric razor it seems a bit steep but I suppose it saves on costs of foam and razor heads. I felt like I needed one though because using a razor was like punishment and I get ingrowing hairs if I am not meticulous with correct angle of raking it across my face. I shaved with a disposable before I went out last night and fucked up my neck really badly. The razor must have had two settings; 'skin' and 'hair' with the button promptly stuck on 'skin' because I was wiping fuck loads of blood off afterwards alongside the pain of having aftershave applied to the fresh wounds. The only reason I was using a disposable is because I have lost the adapter for the electric.
There is a bit of an urban legend that hair grows thicker if you shave it. I'm advised this is bollocks though and hair folicles don't 'learn' which I am happy to believe because I forget that I have been shaving for about 10 years now and my stubble would be like twigs.
quote:Originally posted by ally: But it never occured to me that it might be an option for the guys. I'd heard of back, sack and crack wax, but I thought it was only hardcore queers who were into that. Am I wrong?
You'd think with enough friction that they would just fall out.
[ 12.12.2004, 18:18: Message edited by: New Way Of Decay ]
quote:Originally posted by New Way Of Decay: There is a bit of an urban legend that hair grows thicker if you shave it.
I think the legend is that it grows "coarser"... that the shaving stimulates growth and that shaving, cutting the hair at an angle, makes it, I don't know, "blunter" or something.
Not sure how true this is but it could have grown up from the fact that when you start shaving as a lad, your hair does inevitably become less fine and darker over time, ie. as bum-fluff is replaced with real manly bristle. This could just be a natural process though, and nothing to do with the effects of the razor except that you're clearing the finer, softer, blonder (in my case aged 16... well actually until age 21 or so on the cheeks ) hair away for the virile tough stuff to come through.
I have never had a stranger wax my "boxer-short line" and see no real reason to, unless you are a gay who likes the idea; a normal man can tidy himself up in that region, with clippers. It looks a lot tidier and just feels "cleaner" with the nob gone. More smooth, like a girl.
quote:Originally posted by New Way Of Decay: There is a bit of an urban legend that hair grows thicker if you shave it.
The point is that when you shave the hair you make it blunt because you are only removing the hair from above the skin surface and not removing it from its root. When it grows through again you don't have a tapered fine end to the hair but a chopped, thicker end that appears coarser than before. So the hair isn't actually thicker, but it looks as though it is.
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Lol, join the club dude, I have many old pictures of me with beards of varying shape and size from wolfman look complete with ear length hair (those were the days) to the carefully trimmed goatee and many in-between, all with that unsightly ginger tint.
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It occurs to me that the marketers behind razors must have gone to the same classes as the marketers behind ink-jet printers. In both cases, you pay a entry fee into their product, and then spend the next several years playing into their hand, buying overpriced replacement cartridges.
In my case, I've been using a Gillette somethingorother razor for about the last ten years. The handle itself, the part that holds the blades, is simple. It's got a clippy-bit at the top that the blades clip into. And every so often, when successive drags across my chin have blunted and prompted me to discard all the blades at my disposal, I'll look into picking up a replacement package at the store.
So, the "shaving system" I bought into originally was called the "Gillette Sensor". And it was a simple system - a couple blades, worked well enough at removing stubble from the face.
But those Gillette people, they're no fools. Every so often, they sour the deal just a little bit more. First, it was repackaging them, so the replacement blades come in packages of eight, instead of ten. Then, they introduce the "Sensor Excel", which has some sort of extra something on it which of course makes it so much better than the old version, and wouldn't I be stupid for wanting to keep with the old version? And just to make that point, they price the new version just below the old version, so every time I go to the store, I see the new blades there on the shelf, next to the ones I want to buy. Taunting me with the allure of new features I don't need or want. But it costs 20 cents less! So, grudgingly, I buy into the new one, and they even fit onto the old razor handle! I'm happy for about six months until I realize they've duped me and discontinued the old blades when I wasn't looking. I notice, of course, when they hike the price on the new blades, and sell them in even smaller packets for the same price. Bastards.
Oh! And now they've gone and added an extra third blade onto these things. What does it do? Fucked if I could tell you, other than giving the Mighty Gillette Company the justification for raising the cost of their replacement razor blades AGAIN, and- oh! again!- sorry mister consumer, because we had to fit the extra blades in there, we need to reduce the number of blades per package again! We know you'll understand we have to raise the price again, too- cost of redesigning the package, see? But I'm sure you'll agree with us that you're buying a brand-new and super-mega-improved product. Why do we know? Of course!- we haven't given you any alternative!
Again- bastards.
But when push comes to shove, what do I do about it? Nothing. I continue to silently seethe and just take it. In the prison of the absense of consumer choice, I'm the inmate who's stuck taking it up the arse from Bubba, because Bubba's bigger and Bubba makes the rules, don't he.
I like the idea of a teemo beardathon. We fellas can grow some winter facial insulation. But what for the laydees? Perhaps they can grow some extra insulation down below- au naturel, and retro too, like the 70s all over again- to beat those chilly winter drafts!
I have a feeling at this point that I have failed to address the question posed by the beginning of this thread.
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There was a program on Channel Four years ago where top designers were asked to re-design an item that appeared to have reached the peak of it's evolution. One team was given the razor, and they came up with the idea of crossing the wet-shave razor with an electric one. The program ended with them selling the idea. Nobody knew who David Beckham was in those days.
Don't like shaving oil. Found that it caused the hairs to cling to the blades too much and made rinsing difficult. I use Nivea. Senstive. Like me.
For a blade I use Mach 3, but I'm thinking of switching to a Wilkinson. I just want the change.
A friend of mine shaves his ball bag and the base of his cock. He says it makes his cock look bigger. I'm not making this up.
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When I was younger when my pubes were a new found forest to me I did attack them with some scissors. Im not sure why, I was in the bath and my newly grown shrubbery seemed strangley alien.
It was only a couple of snips and then reality kicked in when I saw my pubes float away from me in the bath like leaves from a waterside tree. I got scared and cursed myself for my desercration of such a hallowed area.
I was left with semi bald patch ( a sort of alopecia of the pubes)at one point I was worried I would be scarred for life but thankfully, few weeks down the line, things were back to normality in my pants.
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What's with the ginger beard thing? Loads of men who grow beards end up half red, whatever their hair colour. Apart from my father, who ended up with one side white, one side black, which was quite excellent before he whipped it off.
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Sainsbury's disposables. I bought a value pack of 20 in the summer, and they're still going strong. I had one of those mach 3 ones a year or so ago, but it seemed a bit pricey to be buying new blades for it. Anyway, to go with my cheap razors, I found a can of foam in the bathroom. I think it's Boots or something, it's past its date but it works fine. I refuse to go blowing huge amounts of money on the process as I don't see the point. It's just an irritating thing that has to be done every now and then, but given the choice, I wouldn't bother. The last time I stopped, my boss told me to have a shave.
[ 13.12.2004, 04:23: Message edited by: Dr. Benway ]
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I started shaving with a Gillette Sensor, but since the shaving companies were notified of my 12th birthday, I've received new complimentary razor every few months. My collection now includes:
Gillette Sensor Gillette Mach 3 Gillette Mach 3 Turbo Wilkinson Sword FX Performer Wilkinson Sword Quattro
In terms of foam, I haven't found anything to better the products of Noxzema. Their mentholated foam is perfect for warm mornings, but not so good for these winter months as it causes a veritable chin-chill factor, when you step out of the door. Girls: don't use this for your intimate parts!
A great alternative is provided by their cocoa butter variation. Also they come in big tins which look quite manly. And they last forever.
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quote:Originally posted by Roy: A friend of mine shaves his ball bag and the base of his cock. He says it makes his cock look bigger. I'm not making this up.
Yeah cheers for leaving out the part where I showed you and proved it... you make me look like the prick by only telling half the story.
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You can also "go deeper" because the hair at the cock-base forms a kind of spring... like a cushion of gorse (as the best illustration, think of jumping on a field of heather... now think of jumping on a bare stone path... point taken?)
With soft curls at the base, the shaft can't actually plunge as deeply into the home you've chosen for it... there's always an inch of springy "resistance", which is great for rhythm but you'll find shearing it lets you go that "extra mile" (or inch, in this case. Doubling the length, if you are Roy.)
quote:Originally posted by Thorn Davis: What's the point in making your cock look bigger? Isn't that just going to cause disappointment in two minutes time?
quote:Originally posted by kovacs: You can also "go deeper" because the hair at the cock-base forms a kind of spring... like a cushion of gorse (as the best illustration, think of jumping on a field of heather... now think of jumping on a bare stone path... point taken?)
With soft curls at the base, the shaft can't actually plunge as deeply into the home you've chosen for it... there's always an inch of springy "resistance", which is great for rhythm but you'll find shearing it lets you go that "extra mile" (or inch, in this case. Doubling the length, if you are Roy.)
I hope you don't need a diagram for this.
I appreciate the theory behind this - I've heard similar things from pornographic literature. I've always been sceptical about how much extra length it would grant - after all a full strength pelvic thrust would mash your pubes down to just a few millimetres thick, surely? If this is getting too much for a Monday morning, I hope people will let me know.
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quote:Originally posted by kovacs: With soft curls at the base, the shaft can't actually plunge as deeply into the home you've chosen for it... there's always an inch of springy "resistance", which is great for rhythm but you'll find shearing it lets you go that "extra mile" (or inch, in this case. Doubling the length, if you are Roy.)
I thought that gays shaved their gential hairs because "there's nothing worse than getting a wodge of pubes clenched between a sweaty pair of butt-cheeks and torn out.".
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![[Embarrassed]](redface.gif)
) hair away for the virile tough stuff to come through.
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