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Some things in life promise so much, some look so appealing and then fail to deliver - sausage and mash on the menu at your local pub, the way that 1940's movies make smoking look really good, how refreshing a drink whiskey seems to be in the old west, yet in reality none of these things live up to their billing.
Nothing more so than Converse all stars trainers - they look so good, they look so comfortable, and yet, slip one on and suddenly your foot screams as each and every piece of gravel, cigarette but or street trash punches through the usless souls in onto your feet. Walk for more than half a mile and your poor fallen arches begin to burn as they find themselves unsupported and rubbing.
So, TMO, what has lied to you in the past? What has presented itself in an oasis like mirage of beauty, only crash into mundane awfulness upon approach?
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I got a book on that there tantric sex malarkey. It was rubbish. I sat myself down, got out the baby oil, but alas, no bluddy pictures.
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My Cons are pretty comfortable, although I wouldn't go hiking in them. Maybe there's something wrong with your feet?
I feel I was consistently lied to throughout my school life about how important it was to work hard and pass your exams, so that you could get "a good job".
More specifically, hair removal cream and bikini waxing strips were useless products wrapped in swathes of lies. Also that "brilliant brunette" shampoo. Turd-brown hair is turd-brown hair.
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Not being a total child means I can wear Converse All Stars without bleating like a little lamb about how much they hurt. However I would agree with Vogon about the lies to do with getting educated, getting a decent job, getting ahead etc. I wouldn't have minded if there'd been more emphasis on simple self improvement through education - I could have related to that, and I agree with it. But the nonsense about jobs and stuff is just shit. I still don't have any clear idea of how to succeed in the world of work.
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quote:Originally posted by Benny the Ball: So, TMO, what has lied to you in the past? What has presented itself in an oasis like mirage of beauty, only crash into mundane awfulness upon approach?
Octavia
I hate Valentine's Day. Stupid commercialised crap
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quote:Originally posted by Benny the Ball: So, TMO, what has lied to you in the past? What has presented itself in an oasis like mirage of beauty, only crash into mundane awfulness upon approach?
Friends. Everyone bangs on about how 'friends are the new family', and if you've got 'good friends' then you're set. But what happens? They all bugger off and have babies. No more cheeky Thursday piss-ups (or Tuesday, Wednesday or Friday piss-ups, for that matter), no more Sunday afternoons renting a box-set of ER for a Noah-Wyle-fest, no phone calls at one in the morning with slurred demands to Come Out And Play. It sucks.
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I'm feeling that. A few years ago, I had loads of friends. I was out every other night and I was booking my weekends about a month in advance. A social butterfly - drink in hand, and a glint in my eye.
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Ipods! The ads make them look sooo cool. All the people dancing and having trendy hair and clothes and looking uber cool. Well I have one next to me and I'm just as much of a dork as I was yesterday.
quote:Originally posted by squeegy: Ipods! The ads make them look sooo cool. All the people dancing and having trendy hair and clothes and looking uber cool. Well I have one next to me and I'm just as much of a dork as I was yesterday.
quote:So, TMO, what has lied to you in the past? What has presented itself in an oasis like mirage of beauty, only crash into mundane awfulness upon approach?
Losing weight will instantly make you feel wonderful and you will be a more secure and happy person for it
Its a lie!
I have just exactly the same insecurities as before I just have a smaller bum to sit on whilst I contemplate them
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Octavia
I hate Valentine's Day. Stupid commercialised crap
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I suspect that this is also true about having lots of money, but I'd quite like the opportunity to find out for myself.
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Ask any estate agent and they'll all agree: turning the loft room into a porn dungeon adds greater value than an extra bedroom. It's a 'feature'.
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quote:Originally posted by Dr. Benway: I'm quite lonely.
I would take you out for a beer but I have no money. I am totally trying to cane off all debt in one swoop so that I emerge from the poor cacoon like a bling butterfly flapping my wings into the wind tunnel of dollar bill$z.
But you can always come over to chez Television and hang if you want to escape craggy towers.
Ever felt robbed?: Adults saying to me as a child "good things come in small packages" As if dealing with the fact that you are a stunted dwarf, they give you a hang up about penis size.
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I'd luv to take both of you out for a much deserved beer. However, I suspect it may become some sort of cock comparing competition. Its always about the cock with you guys.
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You know, there'd be buggerall to do here, but I do a when I think of you sat in on your own. I know you're a big boy now but I like to keep the door open.
I should probably mention that my girlfriends knitting makes me sad so you should ignore my sentimental nonsense.
[ 09.11.2005, 09:35: Message edited by: New Way Of Decay ]
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Freelancing: as sold = freedom, constant commissions by editors in challenging spectacles, a world of exciting possibilities open to you, only minor self-publicity required. Reality = doing work I was doing 10 years ago, gradual erosion of self-confidence, inability to self-publicise due to said lack of confidence, increase in bitterness regarding youngsters telling me what to do, absence of writing on laptop on sunny park bench.
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quote:Originally posted by London: I would like to become a butcher. Is this feasible, do you think?
dunno. do you like playing with meat, throwing sausages around, working in the freezing cold and potentially chopping you hands off?
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I'd like to become a plasterer, or a carpenter, or a cheese shop proprietor. Yes, that dream is still trotting along, mainly because I want the pickle cupboard called Chutney Locker.
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If you ever want a change of scenery Doc B you're always more than welcome to come and spend a weekend in sunny Woking at chez Physic, a half hour train ride from Waterloo and you too can marvel at the site of half-built blocks of flats and a crap statue which has something to do with War Of The Worlds.
Seriously though, mi casa su casa or however the fuck it goes.
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quote:Originally posted by London: I would like to become a butcher. Is this feasible, do you think?
I do a fair bit of my own butchery, something I learnt from my Grandfather and handy these days as I only get back home to the land of 'good meat' once in a while.
Like now I have a good quarter of a cow in my deep freeze, bought in giant chunks it's cheaper but I've had to butcher it all up into normal steaks, prime rib, rib eye on the bone, sirloin steaks and rib eye steaks (de-boned) and a couple of decent sized roasting joints rolled and tied for a good Sunday lunch when I can be arsed to make Yorkshire puddings.
I love it..
Because I never did a proper apprenticeship I can probably never be a butcher though, so I reckon it's probably quite hard to become one.
My family likes to do that sort of thing though, not so much the butchery but the finding of foods, going halfway across England to buy a sheep or a deer was normal for me as a kid..
Worst job ever though for a butcher has to be cleaning and preparing tripe, there's no smell on the planet that can compare, no slimier, rubberier goop known to man..
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