Scrawn-vuss reckons Louche is a mong but Louise is coll. With your pictore you implied that Louise was also a mong. Bandy. You mong!
Posts: 2689
| IP: Logged
Down South, they have big cocks. With these big cocks, they make more kids. So they win.
No no! That is the wrong way round I think. Down South they have small cocks, so don't bother having sex and go to work instead. And become richer.
But surely the reason that extra-large condoms sizes can't be found down south is that the men down south have bigger cocks than the men up north and therefore all the extra-large condoms have sold out?
Posts: 786
| IP: Logged
scrawny
One Mojito, two Gin and Tonics, Three Bacardi Lime Sodas, and a couple of pints of Stella please.
posted
quote:Originally posted by Raz: Bandy. You mong!
I should have just said this and saved time and offence.
-------------------- ...because that's the kind of guy you are. Posts: 2730
| IP: Logged
posted
Is it specifically extra-large that we are debating here? I keep both Large and Regular condoms depending on how insecure the bloke is, but I've never seen extra-large.
quote:Originally posted by Uber Trick: Is it specifically extra-large that we are debating here? I keep both Large and Regular condoms depending on how insecure the bloke is, but I've never seen extra-large.
quote:Originally posted by Ringo: I've got a small cock and no money. Can someone please explain where I'm going wrong here?
Take your own condoms, as the ladies of today only stock Large and Regular. It's like MacDonalds! Maybe you'd feel better if you called yours a Regular. Does it come with mayo?
posted
So there you are getting jiggy with each other flak, flak, flak <thinks> Shit, its going to be condom time soon. Where the fack did I put my measure? O yes, it's under the bed. Now how can I measure his cock without embarrassing the poor lad? O I know! flak, flak, flak *pulls hand off on final upwards flak, quickly flips over onto front, reaches under the bed - all the time keeping the fingers circled to represent the girth*
What are you doing, babes?
Nothing, won't be a second, you keep it going, sexy.
*flak, flak, flak*
<thinks> What size, what size? *measures finger girth representation against cock-o-meter* EXTRA-LARGE! Holy cow.
quote:Originally posted by Astromariner: I'm going to read all snorton's posts in Elaine C. Smith's voice now.
You won't find very many of those around here these days though. Sorry.
But seriously folks. Just look at this thread and the other one posted by the hapless Louise on Tesco muffins. Read through them again. What can you find there, save a pathetic combination of witless comments and bile spat at a poster who borders on the inconsequential?
It's all pretty sad. In the (prepare for cliché...) "old days" we had Ben's sharp wit and London's feminazi acidic tongue, but now this place seems to be surviving on a diet of Louchesque whining. At least Bandy is still around to provide the odd genuine lol with a bit of well-crafted phoo, which is something I suppose.
Forget that it's me saying all this, eh? Just think about it. Is TMO still an interesting place to hang around, or are you all starting to find yourselves doing other things and/or posting elsewhere?
It's a serious question.
-------------------- "You ate the baby Jesus and his mother Mary!" "I thought they were animal cookies..." Posts: 4130
| IP: Logged
posted
Will forumites please try and remember that Louise is about twelve and you're all in your fifties. It's like an inverse Ahmania situation. She doesn't fit in with the rest of the group, so she goes a bit nuts.
Posts: 14017
| IP: Logged
posted
I only read TMO in case Snoreton posts some more about his favourite cheese. I know he doesn't post much anymore, but I can't be the only one who lives in hope of reading about TMO's vital bowel, folk demon, controversial statement-making heavyweight joy-giver.
-------------------- What I object to is the colour of some of these wheelie bins and where they are left, in some areas outside all week in the front garden. Posts: 4941
| IP: Logged
quote:Originally posted by Gail: I cycled through a village called Norton Malreward on Saturday.
What's it called on the other days?
Sometimes, I really appreciate cheesy formulaic jokes, eg.: "... a man with a wooden leg named Smith?"
I will therefore share the following with the forum:
quote:exhibit 'a': Scientists recently found a porpoise which had small growths on its underbelly resembling the nubs of malformed legs. They observed the animal for several days but in the end decided against surgically removing the growths, on the grounds that this would be defeeting the porpoise.
quote:Originally posted by Uber Trick: Is it specifically extra-large that we are debating here? I keep both Large and Regular condoms depending on how insecure the bloke is, but I've never seen extra-large.
I was just after anything slightly larger than usual, see if it made any difference.
And after an emergency trip to Colchester, a box of the elusive 'Pasanté Large' turned up in the big Tesco. They're only 1mm wider than ordinary ones, but looked about 3ft longer (not suggesting Mr Lou is that well endowed, before you all leap on my innocent comment). Avanti, the non-latex Durex condoms, are 10mm wider than standard latex condoms, but we haven't tested them yet, so I can't comment. In case anyone was actually interested.
-------------------- Because fat guys always win at see-saw Posts: 896
| IP: Logged
quote:exhibit 'a': Scientists recently found a porpoise which had small growths on its underbelly resembling the nubs of malformed legs. They observed the animal for several days but in the end decided against surgically removing the growths, on the grounds that this would be defeeting the porpoise.